Greatest of all time? No. Possibly not even the greatest of half-term. This loud, chaotic and unlovable animated kids’ comedy feels as though it is bordering on AI slop, algorithmically generated and instantly familiar from Zootropolis, Sing and other movies with talking animals. It is a shame, because it has a real-life inspiration: basketball star Stephen Curry, who was repeatedly told at the start of his career that he was too skinny and too small to make it as a pro. Curry is a producer here, and has a performing role. But in spite of this connection, Goat lacks heart and soul, and a sense of genuine emotions.
What it does have is some pretty decent voice acing, bringing a degree of charm to the movie. Will Harris (voiced by Caleb McLaughlin) is a goat who has grown up dreaming of playing professional “roarball”, a fiercer and faster version of basketball. But Will is a “small” and roar players are all “bigs” – powerful beasts such as rhinos and horses. Will’s hero and the star of his favourite team, the Thorns, is a panther called Jet (Gabrielle Union), a champ close to retirement but determined to win the league. When Will gets a shot at joining the Thorns, he is laughed at, underrated but undeterred.
There are some decent jokes, but they are lost in all the noise. Watching Goat is like standing next to a helicopter as it’s taking off. The roarball games are deafening, and pitched at lightning speed, in courts that switch from jungle settings to an arctic ice experience. The underdog plot is as old as time, and for a film targeted at under-eights there are a lot of scenes with mobile phones, and characters constantly checking their socials. The only thing that lingers after leaving the cinema is a headache.
